If you attended the Anna Templeton Christmas Tea & Craft Sale, you might have seen my latest campaign “Gravity is a Hoax!”

Okay, I know this is going to be a difficult sell but (and this is only because I am a woman of great conviction and resilience) I am willing the fight the good fight.

I have two solid fact-based reasons in defence of my position.

Number 1: Gravity is a hoax, because I don’t believe in it.

And neither did Einstein. (He thought it was all relative.)

Newton was a junk scientist. That’s just a fact.

And (Point B): Nature Doesn’t Lie.

Look at the birds in the sky. They don’t know about gravity. Maybe if we didn’t listen to Newton, we could fly also.

At the tea and sale, this past November, I sold one of these to a physicist. She was going to hang it in her office at Memorial University of Newfoundland. She agreed with me! That’s a solid endorsement.

I was also surprised by the two people who tried to convince me that gravity is not a hoax, but is a real thing. One, a woman visiting from the West Coast, had encountered members of the flat earth society. I admitted to her that I have a soft spot in my heart for those people. This only made her exhort with me all the more passionately.

The other man had read an article in a popular science magazine about the Hubble telescope…I think. He was an older gentleman, and he was quite concerned that I stand corrected in my fallacy. I don’t remember much about his argument, but it had something to do with Stanford University’s really long accelerator lab? I only remember that part, because when I taught in a Silicon Valley parochial high school, me and my friends would rollerblade in the park above SLAC. It was fun. And no, I wasn’t teaching physics.

It is so reassuring to me that there are at least two people in this world who care enough about my sanity, that they will debate with me about something so patently ridiculous. Human kind indeed. An amazing species, when you think about it.

I came up with my new campaign after reading (now) Prime Minister Mark Carney’s book Values (2021) where he described Greta Thunberg’s confrontational speech to the UN Climate Action Summit (2019). “Her determination lays bare the imperatives of climate physics…” (Carney 275).

Calling climate change science a hoax is as ridiculous as calling gravity a hoax. But still, that’s what President Trump said last week at Davos. You can be excused for not noticing. He says a lot of things. It really has come to the point where we all need to stop listening to him. Which is basically what Carney said at Davos the day before.

(Also, you need to read Values. And underline it. And, if you’re Canadian, hold Mark Carney to his values.)

My point is: when going downstairs to the toilet tonight (another physical imperative only this one is brought on by my bladder) if I slip on those stairs, it really doesn’t matter whether I believe in gravity or not.

That’s all I wanted to say.

And I wanted to make some of you laugh.

Thanks for paying attention.

–Jennifer Morgan, January 28, 2026